Dear Gym

Dear Gym,  I love you.

When I doubt myself, I can come visit you so you can make me feel powerful.

When I am giving up on my dreams, you pull me back up on my feet and remind me how strong I am.

You always take me back, no matter how complacent I get.  No matter how much I slack off on our friendship, it’s like we were never apart.

As soon as I leave you, I want to run back to you because you make me feel strong.

I appreciate you, but most importantly, you remind me to appreciate myself.

Even if my weight fluctuates over the years, I know that it is I who holds the energy to accomplish all I wish. It is me who has this amazing body to use for expressing life.

This soul within a beautiful being can move, dance and sing and I am so happy for it.

I am honored to have the privilege of inhabiting this wonderful body capable of many things.

Thank you Gym for reminding me of my power and life.

 

I am whole and perfect. My energy is aligned with the harmony of the Earth’s energy. I am balanced, I am energy, I am light. I am, I am, I am.

~The soul as Healer

 

 

 

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Magically delicious

Ever since I was a young girl, I have had a genuine interest in singing, dancing and acting…really any performance arts there are.

I wanted to do it all. Living with my parents, although they tried to allow me some activities, we didn’t have enough money for lessons. I did choir, band and pep squad but never gave anything my full attention.

I refused to make my circumstances as a child hold me back from my dreams. Even becoming a teen mother did not stop me from performing in a theater production, modeling, and singing with a band. I was even a magician’s assistant.

I refuse to lose my inner child telling me that I can achieve my dreams. Even though everyone has always said I couldn’t, I will never stop. To think people purposely want you to doubt your abilities is tragic.

I will relentlessly chase and achieve my dreams.

I don’t want to be like anyone else

I ought to just stick to myself

I’m a lot of things that I didn’t know myself.

In my mind’s eye

that’s where I reside

I find peace when I rest inside.

Lucky me

In the third month of my thirty-third year

This is a magical time for me.

I know who I am and what I want.

I won’t let anyone mess up my peace.

Becoming my inner goddess

I will only accept what is right for me.

I will only speak of light and peace.

I will become who I am meant to be.

Lucky you for knowing me

I have amazing strengths.

I have great talents.

I am a beautiful soul.

This year has just begun. Good things are coming. I believe in me.

 

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Awesome year, amazing me

The new year

is a time to realize, renew and re-focus.

The past few years, I have been insecure, angry and bitter.

This year, I am reclaiming my woman strength and confidence in my intuition.

My 33rd year is going to be filled with good things. I will make it lucky.

If I have snapped at you, I can only apologize for being in defense of myself. The past has shown me that most people can’t be trusted.

I have been going through so much. The people I had around me most of my life never truly appreciated me. The only people I loved were kept from me and I was ridiculed, mocked and mistreated by many.

Being a teen mother was hard enough without the rude, selfish and hateful people that were a constant in my life.

I was free of them, but not the pain. The past has haunted me for too long and now I shall let go forever.

Things have a wonderful way of working out for the best. I have no regrets. I am who I am and though some hardships were my fault and others, not; I am a beautiful human. I only wish to share the happiness with all those around me.

I dismiss any people or events that have hurt me or made me uncomfortable in the past. I will now only accept great things because that is what my life deserves.

The people in my life now are positive, happy and fun. The community I am a part of support each other and their ideas and talents.

This year will be good, better, best…

I have it so good. What a wonderful adventure to be on with the people who love me.

May I never take it for granted. May I make each moment count. May I make my life what I want it to be.

What will you do this year to make it your best ever?

 

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Dismal

The other day I was in the shoe aisle at walmart and to my dismay, there wasn’t much of a selection for my little girl.

I overheard a little voice say “but I don’t like them” and a man replied,”well that’s what you are getting. ”

I was thinking, it never gets better kid. I never felt as though I had the things I wanted. But what if I was wrong?

We have to go after what we want. We have to work hard and towards those goals. You aren’t going to get it from your looks.received_2088342061489680-1234108447.jpeg

Why are we so obsessed with how many calories we burn or what to eat?

Why do we care what other people have or do?

What if we didn’t care about those things and only focused on ourselves?

You can still have what you want but you gotta let go of your ideas about it.

To be free you must accept things as they are. It’s my hardest lesson so far.

What could I do if I was free?

I could love myself as I am.

I could focus on the present and make everyday better.

I could learn new things instead of letting fear rule.

I could be a good example and be a light for others to follow.

That’s what we really want, right? Or will that new dress really solve all your unhappiness? Maybe for a moment. Ok at least a day, lol.

Now is your time to go for it!

What will you do to make your dreams come true?

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when will i bloom?

Let it Go

Now that you are all grown up,

You can tell that the values you grew up with were mostly incorrect. You didn’t know any better, you were just listening to your elders. Respecting people that probably didn’t respect you, other people or even themselves. They probably still don’t get it. Move on from those people, it’s not your fault. Let it go.

Open your eyes

You can do and be who you want to be. You will never reach perfection, most people never do. You don’t have to. You have to reach acceptance. That perfect acceptance that is so forgiving of your past, that it never comes into your present. When you’re your present best self, you allow for your perfect future self to form. Nothing will ever be perfect, let it go.

Sing your song.

Dance your dance. Do your thing. It’s all about what you’re doing now. Don’t let anyone put you back in the past. You are a more perfect person in the present, use that person’s knowledge. Treat yourself how you want others to treat you. Be your present self and sing your song. Live in this moment.

What are you doing to be your present self? Comment! I want to know 🙂

Sean Alexander Dixon

The voice of Sean Alexander Dixon is an unmistakable one. His calm, melancholy voice inspires you to visit the countryside, have a drink with friends and just enjoy being. When your with Sean, he makes you feel like part of the family.

Our most recent visit to Maxine’s Live was to see this kind fellow. He opened for Parker Gispert of The Whigs. His acoustic set was a clear and crisp sound that warms your heart.

I am so happy to call this humble musician my friend and i look forward to more of his solo gigs. May he inspire many more people with his sweet, country voice and get people dancing with his rock n roll attitude.

I just found the Federalis on spotify! Go have a listen! I know I will 🙂

 

photo credit: Blake Harris/Rasta Seeds Photography

I’m gonna let it shine

When we have a choice of road to take, most of the time it is the easier one we choose. But sometimes we either don’t have a choice or we think we don’t and aren’t doing right by ourselves.  We all know our limits but the harder road grows us more.

Life is just like a hiking trip. It’s totally worth your efforts and of course sometimes you will hurt, but isn’t it better to say that you did it than to not try? Do everything you can while you can because one day you may not be able to.

You are the maker of your own life. You have to stand up for what you want.  If you exhaust yourself then it will be impossible to do even one thing. That being said, there are ways to do what you must and work towards what you want.

Remember that the most important thing is to always be kind.  Because it is the least and most that you can do for anyone. All the while, you are remembering your inner self and not letting anything sway that.

Think only with problem solving and love. Do not let outward perception or feelings penetrate your inner truth. How you treat others is how they will perceive you as a person or professional.

It is imperative that you find your inner peace and work towards your own goals. You must find your fire and always keep it fed. Do not let your fire go out or let others stomp on it.

This little light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine!

 

There may be a great fire in our soul, yet no one ever comes to warm himself at it, and the passers-by see only a wisp of smoke. Vincent Van Gogh

Keep running

There’s just something about running on Whittington Ave that brings my soul back to life. Maybe it’s the trees or how the lighting and temperature are always perfect.  I woke up kinda feeling wore out, but I knew that progress is only possible if I keep going. The beautiful cloud filled sky and first fall leaves just told me things were going to go well today.

Even though my fitclip and phone were dying, I managed to get some music in my ears so I could get the most out of my workout. Running makes me feel alive and happy. I run with the beat of the music and feel empowered by the lyrics. I work through my frustrations and improve my health with these kind of practices.

I have been working on my own fitness and inspiring others to do the same for several years now and I promise that it is not easy. I have relapsed into bad habits that hinder my ideal form and returned to negative feelings a few times. But I am here to tell you to keep going, keep running towards your fulfilled self.

Don’t fall into Fall gut.

Keep pushing forward to reach your fall fitness goals.

I run once a week, what do you like to do to stay happy and healthy?

“But are not this struggle and even the mistakes one may make better, and do they not develop us more, than if we kept systematically away from emotions?” Vincent Van Gogh

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This crazy place I call home

This is one one of those rare epic moments in history that I am so proud to tell you about.

If you want to see talent, you have to visit Texarkana.

My roots are proudly here amongst those that can touch your soul like the legendary acts that you have come to respect throughout history.

If you want to know a little something about this city you must visit Fat Jacks Oyster and Sports Bar which is just one of many places that are a legend in its own right.

Right here we have talented musicians of like mind from many different  talents.

This photo was taken at the Crazy Horse Saloon where I had the pleasure of accompanying Hazy Jayne in Joan Jett’s “I hate myself for loving you” Lee Brooks on guitar and Barry Johnson on bass. What an honor it is to call these guys my friends and see them last night with so many of those that make this city twice as nice with a different country-like feel of Taryn Ashley’s beautiful voice rendition of Jolene and the combination of Greg Hagood’s Red dirt country rock.

Lee Brooks inspires me because he feels the music in his very soul. He has shared that love with so many people and he is not alone in his venture to make music in Texarkana a permanent staple.

There are some crazy folks in t-town where we all find a way to intermingle with a touch of all different genres. Rock being at my heart with not only my mentor Lee but also with his counter-part of my love for this place being that of Jase Bryant and his band Canaan

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He astounds everyone with his nostalgic ability to capture the essence of the true rock of ages that never dies.  With the many other musicians he has introduced me to, the true nature of psychedelic tunes will live forever. The energy I feel from this city is what lights me up and when you are around creative people such as these, the limits to your creativity are boundless.

Jase Bryant and Joshua Foster among many others I love, put so much work into many fantastic shows held at The Silver Dollar. It was the place I felt I belonged and when the doors closed, I truly shed a tear. They have made it so that local talent and musicians from everywhere can have a place to release their hearts and souls into the culture and create a sense of being. Now they are making plans at other local bars to bring in the audience that they have created and is always growing.

I feel that that they have an everlasting urge to never let this art-form die.

Jase  had this to say at the most recent Texarkana Singer/Songwriter showcase:

“I feel extremely lucky to be able to do this at The Arrow. I am obligated to the community to provide unique entertainment that is made up of talented musicians from right here in Texarkana.”

What amazing people that we have in this crazy place I call home.

I am finally so proud to be a part of this city. I have found myself in all of the chaos that is life and I know that its partly due to the fact that I know these crazy, amazing people that are also from here. All the friends I have made and their unique sense of purpose intertwine to create a great place to be.

Even though I may not always be here, my heart will somewhat always be planted here, in Texarkana; the city in two states and of many people with awesome qualities to share.

So thank you for letting me be a part of your world.